Friday, August 5, 2011

Dating 101

I guess I should thank the guys that give me these stories because otherwise what would I have to blog about? Let's start with my most recent favorite story. After the situation with the cray cray guy, I cancelled my dating profile. I decided to sign back up. BUT this time I was going to be more careful who I decided to meet and give my number to. I've got to say, I still have not had any luck, but I'm definitely keeping things simpler.

Dating 101: This guy emails me. He is absolutely gorgeous. I mean beautiful. He lives in Detroit and owns his own gym. He's a boxer, so he's in great shape. We email back and forth a few times and he's like you should come see me. I told him I'd prefer if we maybe met half way and had dinner somewhere. I end up talking to him on the phone. I heard him talking to his son which was really cute. He just seemed really humble. And, that's rare when you find someone who looks like he does. We chatted for a bit and just left it that we would talk later. I get to work the next day and he sends me an email. Get ready for this...seriously....get ready....I can't make this up people.

Guy: I love you -- my jaw must have hit my desk. I died laughing.
Me: You've known me for a few days and never met me. Not possible.
Guy: lol ok .. I love the thought of you
I texted him ...
Me: Yeah you probably shouldn't tell a woman you love her until you've been together for a while.
Guy: Ok I love the feeling I have when I think about u ... How about that?

Haven't talked to him since. Are there really girls out there that would have responded back to him with an I love you? What does he think he's gaining by saying that to me? Does he think I'll pack up my shit and move to Detroit? I'm just dumbfounded by that.

Dating 102: You don't have a car/license. You're in school. I'm 32 years old. You're 21 years old. It's not going to work. Our intellectual levels are so far off it's just not a good idea. And, to be honest. If you don't have a car/license  you shouldn't be trying to date. When I wasn't working, that was the last thought on my mind. How am I going to get into a relationship if I'm not working? You've got to have your life together before you can bring someone else into it.

Dating 103: If I email you and ask how your weekend is going and you respond with "boring." I'm not going to write you back. No matter what I ask or say...if you don't give me anything to respond to, I'm not writing back. Take part in the conversation. Show some interest. And, emailing me an hour later and asking if you can get response isn't going to get you a response either.

Dating 104: Asking me if the person in the picture with me is single and on the website just isn't cool. Not that I thought you were cute anyways, but it's just stupid. So don't do it.

Dating 105: I got this email...

Hey there how are you doing? So I am going to save all the oh your so sexy and oh
your so beautifuls for a little late. How am I supposed to get to know someone
without any substance to the conversation. So I read over your profile and liked what
I read over. So how are you doing? Anything exciting going on this week for you? I woke up did a six mile mtn bike ride. Then ended up heading up to the lake
and went wakeboarding for 7 solid hours . I am sore as hell today. Yet it was well worth it. Have plenty of memories that will last a life time. Have a good day.

That's more exercise than I've gotten in years. So, yeah ... we're not going to work.

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