Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Another Day and a Another Nickel

I had an interview last Friday for a job that would have been amazing to do. I got a call on Monday morning that they decided to go with someone else. I kept telling myself not to get my hopes up, and surprisingly enough, I don't think I did.

I don't remember when I became so numb to bad things happening to me. I don't get excited about much these days. I just feel like I'm constantly let down. The last time I had a date, I was not excited about it at all because I never have good luck. Maybe it's my poor attitude that has left me where I am today. Sometimes I feel like I'm being punished for something I've done wrong.

I wake up everyday and do my job hunt and then it takes everything I have to get up off the couch. I've been working out more than I probably ever have, but I didn't work out the past few days now. Mainly because of pure laziness, and then today I had/have a migraine. I feel like that commercial about depression, and having to whined yourself up a few times a day.

I have been really good about seeing friends as much as possible. I had dinner last night with Ashley which were keeping a pretty good routine of meeting up once a month or so. I haven't seen Dana for a few weeks, but I'm going over on Saturday for her birthday. I really do have a lot of fun with her. Krystal and me have been talking more via email and we even had lunch a few weeks ago. I've been trying to get myself to go see Samantha and Ethan more, but it's hard for me to use gas to drive out there and back. But, I'm uber excited for tomorrow cause Ethan starts swim lessons, and I'm going with. I can't wait to see him in the water.

I've literally been counting down the days until New York....I have 18 more days!! It seems to have been going pretty fast. I honestly cannot wait to get off the couch. I want that whole week away from the TV and the internet. I spend so much time reading up on celebrities and checking my Facebook. And, checking Facebook is not even necessary cause it's not like I get tons of messages everyday. Like I've said before, if I deleted my Facebook page I wonder how many of my 193 friends would actually realize I deleted it. But, back to New York, it'll be a nice change of pace to get out and get some exercise and walk around New York. Oh, not to mention to spend some real qt with Will.

I keep having this dream too where I have to move home. And, when I wake up, I can totally feel the pain inside of having to leave my apartment to move home. It's a horrible feeling. Apparently, subconsciously I'm worried about losing everything and having to move home. My previous blog about the gum chewing didn't work either. Haha. I keep dreaming about chewing gum, and it getting stuck in my mouth. Totally random. Maybe I'll Google dreams with gum chewing.

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